Ahora te puedo ver y escuchar / Now I can see and hear you

Nieve!!!

Ha nevado – estoy sorprendida de ver el paisaje todo en blanco por la mañana. No escuché las previsiones. Sigue nevando. Ayer por la noche fui a ver a mi madre y la nieve debajo de mis pies crujó suavemente y absorbó los ruidos. Hay un silencio nuevo que no estaba los días atrás.

Me gusta y empiezo a mirar otros zapatos…los niños se dieron cuenta rápidamente de mis sandalias.

Durante las ultimas semanas ha habido cambios en algunas relaciones con adolescentes. Conseguí definir mis limites sin castigar y de repente nos miramos, nos hablamos con cuidado, nos relacionamos con respeto. “Hasta aquí…¿donde hay un malentendido? Vale solucionado, te he aclarado las reglas. Yo sé que para ti parecen estúpidas porque fuera del cole actúas libremente, no tienes que esperar en cruzar calles. Pero aquí si. Me imagino que te moleste. Sabes porque es importante para mi?” ..y espontáneamente me contesta, que sabe que yo tengo la responsabilidad…”Exactamente, gracias por comentarlo. Si, me siento segura si puedo confiar en vosotros..si puedo confiar completamente que vais a seguir estas reglas. Entonces puedo salir del territorio escolar con ganas.”

Y mientras estuvimos corriendo detrás del grupo, que habíamos dejado ir para aclarar la situación, empezamos una conversación con curiosidad mutua. Se abre espacio para vernos. Delicioso.

Y parece que esta conversación repercutió en otras relaciones. Me invitan a jugar al futbol y la barrera entre nosotros se reblandece. Creamos vínculos.

Mi campo de experimento queda abierto. “¿Que actitud interior mía favorece la conexión? ¿Que estructuras hacen falta para apoyar al niño para poder expresar y revelarse – una pregunta inspirada por David Shindoll, maestro y facilitador de CNV certificado.

Entrevista con David Shindoll

It has snowed – I am surprised to see the landscape all white in the morning. I didn´t pay attention to the weather forecast. It’s still snowing. Last night I went to see my mother and the snow under my feet crunched softly and absorbed the noises. There is a new silence that was not there days ago.

I like it and start looking for other shoes … the kids quickly noticed my sandals.

During the last few weeks there have been changes in some relationships with teenagers. I managed to define my limits without punishing and suddenly we looked at each other, we spoke with care, we related with respect. “Up to here … where is the misunderstanding? What needs more clarity? Okay solved, I have clarified the rules. I know they seem stupid to you because outside of school you act freely, you don’t have to wait to cross streets. But here you do. I can understand that it might bother you. Do you know why it is important to me? ” ..and he spontaneously answers me, that he knows that I have the responsibility … “Exactly, thank you for saying that. Yes, I feel safe if I can trust you … if I can completely trust that you will follow these rules. Then I can accompany you and the group out of the school grounds eagerly. “

And while we were running after the group, which had gone ahead while we clarified the situation, we started a conversation with mutual curiosity. Space opened up to connect. Delicious.

And it seems that this conversation had an impact on other relationships too among the classmates. They invite me to play soccer and the barrier between us softens. We create links.

My field of experiment is open. What inner attitude of mine favors the connection? What structures are needed to support the child to express and reveal him- or herself – a question inspired by David Shindoll, certified NVC teacher and facilitator.

My liberation is tied up with the children´s liberation…

Published by arcoiris_nvc

I like to go by bike, just the right speed...I ponder about sufficiency in between scarcity and abundance.....if I'm meant to be here, then I want to contribute in my best way...I like listening ...to understand

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